GRIMALDI’S LEGION WANTS YOU (YES, EVEN YOU, EARTHIE)

 

INCOMING TRANSMISSION....COMMLINK ESTABLISHED...

"MORE THAN A SUBSCRIPTION - IT'S A BLOOD OATH TO THE SPECTRAL LEGION!"

Tired of Earthie mags written by soulless suits who think jump scares qualify as horror? Ready to trade your pathetic existence for a rank in Grimaldi's eternal legion?

ENLIST TODAY AND EARN YOUR STRIPES—IN BLOOD.

💀 YOUR LEGIONNAIRE REWARDS:

✔ GLOWING MEMBERSHIP CARD (branded with your new demonic callsign)

✔ LEGIONNAIRE LOTTERY – Get featured in the mag + win cursed prizes

✔ 4 SPECTRAL LEGION BUTTONS (featuring Grimaldi’s savagest insults)

✔ 4 QUARTERLY ISSUES (Smuggled to your doorstep via cursed postal raven)

✔ LIFETIME 10% OFF all Oblivion Trading Post merch

🔥 THIS ISN’T A FAN CLUB—IT’S A COSMIC COUP.

🚀 JOIN BEFORE THE PORTAL SEALS:

👉 https://obliviontradingpost.com/collections/space-monsters-magazine-digital-editions

ONLY 17 SPOTS LEFT!

End Transmission

🔗 Follow the Coven: Space Monsters

#SpectralLegion #HorrorHierarchy #GrimaldiApproved